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Tax Day

I actually got up in a fairly decent mood.  I didn't waste much time getting back on to our tax return.  All the figures checked out, so I finished up quickly and waited for Jake to come home for his signature and then took to copy and mail.  We're actually getting a refund which we'll just apply to next year's taxes.

I was thinking about how hungry I felt yesterday.  It occurred to me that the bowl of oatmeal I eat, and usually a banana, have a lot of volume, much more than the little pb sandwich I ate yesterday.  It fills me up even if it doesn't last as long as some meals might.  I ate oatmeal again, but not until 2:00 (yes, I have a very weird schedule).  I did good the rest of the afternoon, eating a handful of almonds late afternoon and then had dinner (or more like lunch for me) about 6:30:  2 ounces of smoked sausage, a small potato with Brummel & Brown and steamed broccoli with a little Velveeta melted on top.  I did finally have my pb sandwich and am at about 1070 calories at the moment.

I did start earlier at trying to get some steps in.  I need to find ways to "waste" steps during the day, finding all kinds of reasons to walk around or walk in the other room.  I jogged 18 minutes right before lunch and took a few more little walk breaks and ended up with 11,100 steps.  

The rest of the day, reading, some homework, a little housework.  I texted with my friend, Bonnie, for awhile.  We haven't seen each other since the pandemic, and I miss her.  Right now, I am probably reading 1-3 books a week, plus a lot of blogs.  On my homework, I typed out the whole exercise, planning on filling in comments and insights as I go.  I did more thinking over the questions than anything and praying to be very open and honest.  I have noticed that sometimes I try to convince myself that I'm a certain way when I'm really not.  The power of suggestion can be too strong for me sometimes.  This exercise lists a lot of traits common in people from dysfunctional families.  I have quite a few, but some don't really apply; and I should not try to convince myself that they do.  

The phrase "let go and let God" has been running in my head a lot.  A. talked to me a lot about letting go of judgments and resentments.  I think so much of that comes from thinking we have more control than we do.  I've worked on that for decades, but it's definitely a process.  I was feeling some real release today in that regard.  It's been a learning curve to learn to just let people be who they are with the knowledge that I can go on and live my life.  

I'm hoping to fall asleep faster soon.  It was past 4:00 again this morning, but I didn't really sleep past 10:00.  

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